Kiss Me
by Lady.Uchiha.18
Summary: Tobi, Kisame, and Deidara are sick of Itachi's know-it-all attitude and decide to get revenge. Contains: Yaoi, maid outfits, spanking, revenge. -not too good at summaries- ; Rated just to be safe! ItachiUKE


Contains: Yaoi, Maid outfits, Spanking, Revenge, Randomness.

Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto. Sadly enough. D:

This is my first story on , so I hope it's okay!

Chapter One: Normal Days…

"Tobi wants a lollipop! Tobi wants a piece of cake! Oh, Tobi wants that dolly!" Tobi sang annoyingly. Deidara gritted his teeth. He was about to smack the masked man any second. He swung his fist around, but had it caught in a familiar tight and angry grip.

"Calm yourself, Deidara." Itachi's voice ordered. Deidara looked up, catching a glint of red, then jerked away, grumbling. Kisame sighed, folding his arms over his chest.

"Did Paine even tell us why he sent us on a four-man mission? It seems none of us are going to agree on one thing." He added under his breath. Itachi averted his eyes, watching around a bit. He shrugged slightly.

"We do as Paine says… No arguments… We should get a motel soon. It's becoming darker and darker as the hours drag on." He explained. Tobi jumped up and down.

"I agree with Itachi-san! " He beamed. A muscle under Deidara's right eye twitched angrily, but he forced himself to calm. He had already dealt with Itachi's powers and he did not like it. Kisame nodded.

"I agree with Itachi… Time to head off." He said. Deidara sighed, holding his head down, his blonde ponytail flipping forward.

"Fine, fine. Let's hurry, though, hmm? I don't want to get caught in the dark. You guys know as well as I do that none of us would make it in the dark, hmm." He muttered. Itachi grimaced in the slight shade of the trees that they passed.

"Yes. Deidara is correct… Unfortunately, none of us can use skills in the dark. Not only that… But it seems that we're running low on energy." He mumbled. Kisame shrugged.

"You guys worry a lot. I'd guess you were together." He smirked behind his Akatsuki collar. Itachi's eyes drifted to Kisame's blankly. Deidara fumed.

"You think you're funny, hmm?! Why would I waste my time with a kid like Itachi?! He's just some little brat who doesn't know his place in society, hmm!" He snapped angrily. Kisame snickered lightly. Tobi giggled, something he did since his mask kept his voice softer.

"Ahh, but Kisame-san is right, Deidara-senpai! You and Itachi would be a nice couple, ne?" He asked with a hint of smirk. Itachi kept silent, trying to keep his emotions down. Of course it was a preposterous idea! Him and Deidara?!

"You shut your mouth, Tobi! Nobody asked you, hmm!" Deidara whacked Tobi over the head. Tobi whimpered, holding his head. Kisame chuckled. Itachi's eyes shot up, catching sight of a motel.

"We can stay there." He said, interrupting an argument, pointing a delicate finger at the old building. Deidara's eyes flicked to the building. He made a face.

"Yea, but that place has a bar. You know, Leaf shinobi or maybe other shinobi may be there and attempt an arrest." He warned. Kisame raised an eyebrow.

"Actually, Itachi… He has a point." He agreed. Itachi shrugged and opened his mouth to comment, but Tobi began to jump up and down excitedly.

"Oh, oh, oh! Tobi knows! Tobi knows! We can all go in with disguises, ne?! It'll work perfectly! Tobi knows good disguise! Yes, yes!" He sang. Kisame and Deidara looked at him with an upset look. Itachi looked at him, tilting his head slightly.

"Actually… That's not a bad idea, Tobi." He commented. Kisame stared at his partner.

"Are you kidding?! What if they sense our chakra?!" He demanded. Tobi squealed in happiness.

"Those shinobi will be too drunk to tell!" He chorused. Deidara shook his head.

"No way! It won't work, hmm! What if we do get caught? What then?" He muttered. Itachi found this a perfect time to piss the artist off.

"Are you afraid that Tobi will make you be disguised as his boyfriend?" He asked. His voice nor face hinted the humor, but inside, he was smirking. Kisame laughed. Tobi brought his hands over his mask, shaking his head in embarrassment. Deidara reached out, grabbing the front of his collar.

"You wanna try making another crack, hmm?! I'll fricking blast your head in!" He threatened. Itachi gave him a blank stare.

"Is everything about being blown up to you, Deidara?" He questioned. Kisame laughed louder. Tobi snickered. Deidara glared and reeled his fist back, but Kisame caught it.

"Alright, alright! Enough. We'll go with the disguise plan, alright?" He asked. Deidara grumbled, letting go of Itachi, who had been lifted two inches from the ground. Itachi's feet lightly and silently hit the ground before he brushed himself off. Tobi waved his arms.

"Weeeee! What are we going to disguise as?! Ne?! Ne?! How about-"

"Nothing stupid like a group of gay idiots!" Deidara snapped angrily. Tobi whined.

"You are so mean, Deidara-senpai. I was not going to say gay anyway." He whimpered. Kisame smacked his forehead. Itachi's eyebrow twitched in slight annoyance. Why had Paine sent them all on this mission? Everyone in the group hated one another, except Kisame and Itachi, who were perfectly compatible as partners.

"Will you all be quiet for once in your short lives?" Itachi demanded, his voice rising slightly above his normal flat tone. Kisame looked up, snapping his mouth shut since he knew Itachi was angry. Deidara 'hmphed' and pouted, looking away. Tobi clapped his hands together in front of his masked face and went silent. Itachi sighed, loving the silence that came after his angry request.

"Now, just think of something simple… Something that will not take up too much chakra. Something that makes it convincing. If you come up with something literally gay, then we'll just walk in there and risk the chance of being arrested." He explained simply. Tobi looked up as if he were thinking. Kisame looked around, thinking. Deidara wasn't even thinking. He was too busy glaring at Itachi, who was staring right back at him. Itachi always had a blank expression on his face. What was up with that?! When Deidara had asked Kisame about it, Kisame only replied with, "Itachi likes to hide his emotions. Just you wait, he'll open up sooner or later."

"I have an idea." Itachi said suddenly. Everyone looked at him. Itachi put his hands together in a hand seal, then a puff of smoke cleared Itachi from view for a few moments, then his form returned. Tobi squealed.

"Good idea, Itachi-san!"

"Hm, I didn't think of that." Kisame added.

"Hmph… It's alright…" Deidara muttered. Itachi shrugged. He wore a Leaf Jounin outfit, complete with a headband and vest as well as a black jumpsuit. Kisame made hands signs, taking the form of a Mist Jounin. Deidara grumbled, making his hand signs and becoming a Rock Jounin. Tobi made his hand signs, taking a Leaf Anbu form. Itachi flashed the motel a look, his hair was now hanging out of his ponytail to hide his face, his eyes their normal onyx color.

"If any of you mess this up…" He started. Kisame could tell he was nervous and decided to lighten the mood.

"Oh, calm down, Itachi. The only thing that could go wrong is if Deidara and Tobi decided to make out in front everyone." He smirked. Tobi grumbled behind the Anbu mask. Deidara growled.

"Shut up, Kisame!" He snapped. Itachi felt a smile tug at the corners of his lips. Kisame always knew how to make him loosen up.

"Right… Well, might as well get this over with." Itachi stated. Kisame nodded, following Itachi who was already moving towards the motel. Tobi trailed behind Itachi, closer than intended while Deidara and Kisame argued.

"Itachi, you are risking showing your face." Tobi warned. Itachi moved his gaze away from Tobi's face.

"I understand, but we need to rest."

"This is not rest. You are wasting our chakra."

"I am not. It was your idea."

"Yea, but to use… How did you even get the idea for your disguise?"

"… Kakashi… Kakashi Hatake."

"You haven't seen him in a while, ne?"

"NO. I am not planning on it." Itachi muttered bitterly, flipping his hair over his shoulder. Tobi's personality suddenly flashed back.

"Itachi, are you trying to be gay by flipping your hair like that?" He asked sweetly. Itachi swung his hand up, smacking Tobi in the face. Tobi yelped, his hands shooting under the mask, most likely caring for his sore nose. Deidara jumped up ahead.

"Oye, what do we do if someone catches on? What if Kakashi is there?"

"That's impossible."

"What if Sasuke's there?" Deidara asked loudly. Itachi stopped walking to glare at Deidara, his eyes flaring red. Kisame reached out, pushing Itachi gently.

"Come on, come on! We need to hurry before my chakra is dead!" He urged. Itachi grimaced a bit, but followed. Deidara smirked and ran after with Tobi following at his heels. Upon entering the bar, it was loud, so nobody bothered to look. Just as they thought, shinobi were scattered around from different villages. Itachi pushed his way through the crowd into a lobby. Kisame, Deidara, and Tobi followed after.

"Excuse me, do you have four rooms left?" Itachi asked the clerk, who looked up.

"Hmm… No, sorry, sir, but we have two rooms left, however, they both have two single beds. Although, they both don't have hot water in the bathrooms." The clerk said. Itachi felt like his world was crashing. No hot water for a bath? Kisame nodded, smacking money on the counter.

"Sure, we'll take them." He smiled. The clerk nodded and took the money, then handing them to the keys. Itachi grimaced, but followed Kisame up the stairs and into a crowded motel hallway. At last, all the Akatsuki members collapsed in the bedrooms exhausted and drained of chakra. Itachi sat on the hard mattress almost angrily, changing back. He threw off his cloak, sighing with relief. Kisame looked up with curiosity.

"You're going to sleep? Now?"

"Yes. I am quite tired… You can do as you please, but I am going right to bed. Tell the others we will be waking up at dawn."

"That's too early! There's no point to this mission anyway!"

"… Oh, fine. Wake me up around noon tomorrow."

"But, it's 7:30 p.m right now! You can't sleep that long!"

"Who said so?" Itachi demanded with a red-eyed glare. Kisame laughed nervously.

"R-Right… See you tomorrow then?"

"Yes."

"Good night…" Kisame said, leaving. Itachi nodded, then fell on the bed, immediately falling into his deep sleep. Kisame paused, an idea flashing into his perverted mind. Could he…? He grinned evilly, then strode down the hallway to Deidara and Tobi's room. He knocked. There was banging then Deidara opened the door.

"What?" He demanded. Tobi popped up beside him in his gray t-shirt and baggy purple-black sweatpants.

"Good evening, Kisame-san!" He greeted cheerfully. Kisame grinned an evil grin.

"You guys wanna get back at Itachi for being nasty all day today?" He asked. Deidara was all ears. Tobi looked up.

"Huh? What do you mean?" He asked. Deidara glared at him.

"He's been doing it all day! He's been putting all three of us down! Talking about how stupid we are!" He snapped. Tobi tilted his head.

"He might hear us, so shush…" He mumbled. Kisame smirked.

"That's where you're wrong."

"Huh?"

"Itachi has a weakness…"

"He does?!"

"Yup."

"And…? What is it?" Deidara demanded. Kisame chuckled darkly.

"Itachi Uchiha's weakness… Is that he's a VERY heavy sleeper… VERY heavy sleeper. You could go in there and have a full battle with Orochimaru and his village and Itachi would NOT wake up."

"Are you serious?" Tobi asked, searching through his personal memory bank in his head. He couldn't think of that as a weakness… Deidara raised an eyebrow.

"So… Itachi won't wake up?"

"Nope."

"Prove it."

"Sure thing!" Kisame tugged Deidara and Tobi into his room. Itachi was already fast asleep. Tobi had to grin behind his mask, tilting his head and folding his hands together

"Awwwww…! Isn't Itachi-chan cuuute?!" He squealed. Deidara winced.

"Shush!" He hissed. Kisame smirked.

"Don't worry. He won't wake up. Watch this." He walked up to Itachi and shoved him, hard. Deidara grimaced, then perked up. Itachi didn't even reply. All he did was sigh deeply and roll over. Tobi stood on tiptoes.

"Wow! How right you are, Kisame-san! But… What do we do for revenge then?" He asked. Kisame laughed.

"If there's one thing Itachi can't STAND… It's lolita."

"Lolita?" Deidara and Tobi asked in unison. Kisame nodded.

"You should hear him when someone walks by wearing that stuff. He gets angry and starts criticizing it non-stop. Something about it being a whore thing. Whatever the reason, I think…" Kisame's voice trailed, only to be picked up by Deidara, who was grinning ear-to-ear.

"We should dress Itachi up in lolita while he's sleeping!" Deidara snickered. Tobi was catching on and perked up, swaying on his feet excitedly.

"Well, there has gotta be more to it then that, ne?!" He exclaimed. Kisame put a finger on his lip.

"We have try and shackle him up so he's hanging from the ceiling a bit. He should dangle just a bit…" He mused. Deidara twirled a finger through his hair, then grinned.

"And then after a bit of yelling, Kisame can take out weapon of some sort. You know, something kinky…"

"A paddle?"

"Sure! Anything! And then you can take a few whacks to teach him a lesson!"

"Perfect! What about you two?"

"I have something of my own design in mind…" Deidara smirked. Tobi jumped up and down, waving his arms.

"Oh, oh, oh! I wanna be the one to do his hair, please, please?!" He whined. Kisame shrugged.

"Sure, but what're you gonna do to him?" He asked.

"Hmmm… Tobi keep it a naughty secret." Tobi snickered. Kisame and Deidara smirked. It was a plan.

"Damn, he's light!" Deidara exclaimed, pulling Itachi up on his feet. Itachi's head fell back limply, his hair falling back as well. His legs hung lifelessly. It was almost like holding a life-like doll of Itachi. Tobi slipped the stockings on his feet, the stockings white with frilly fridges. Kisame had to laugh.

"This is gonna be hilarious!" He snickered. Deidara nodded with a smirk. They set Itachi down on the floor, pulling off his shirt and pants. Kisame had to stop and look at Itachi's perfectly shaped body. Could he be mistaken for a girl? Maybe his face, but no… His body was beautiful, though. Kisame shook his head, then pulled the black and white, frilly, and girly, Lolita dress on him. Deidara pulled Itachi's hair from its ponytail. Tobi smirked and got on his knees, pulling Itachi's hair out, brushing it a bit, then pulling them into two loose and cute pigtails. Kisame burst into laughter.

"Ha! He's gonna be pissed!"

"Haha! You're right!" Deidara agreed, laughing. Tobi grinned and placed a frilly like headband in front of the pigtails. He looked almost like those French maids you see in magazines. Deidara pulled Itachi to his feet as Kisame connected the shackles to the ceiling.

"Alrighty… All set!" Kisame stated, stepping back. Deidara pulled Itachi up, clasping the shackles to his wrists. All three Akatsuki members stepped back to inspect their work. Itachi dangled a foot above the ground, his wrists shackled tightly. The black pigtails hung limp, yet cutely. His cheeks were a slight pink from blush that was applied. The dress was one that was sure to make Itachi angry. It was black on the outside, white frills and white lace around the waist area with a large white bow on the back of the waist. The white frilly headpiece made Itachi's hair color stand out the most. White stockings that seemed to sag just a bit since Itachi's ankles and legs were thin. Kisame put a finger on his lip, then nodded.

"Perfect. Let's get our things and wait until he wakes up."

No, no. It wasn't too long before the poor Uchiha awoke to find the horrible trick. First, nobody was in the room and he was screaming insanely, kicking around and twisting, trying to tear away. Kisame was the first to hear. He stood up.

"Looks like Itachi's awake." He smirked. Tobi and Deidara snickered. Kisame walked to his room, stepping in. Itachi was screaming. Boy, was he pissed. Deidara was surprised. He had never seen the Uchiha this angry! Tobi's eyes widened behind his mask. He had known Itachi for quite some time, but he never knew this side of him. Itachi glared at all three of them, his eyes flaring red.

"IF YOU DON'T LET ME GO RIGHT NOW, I'M GOING TO KILL YOU!! IF YOU THINK I'M KIDDING, YOU'RE IN FOR IT BIG TIME!!! LET ME GO RIGHT NOW!!" He screamed, the shackles making a clanking noise. Kisame kept his eyes from Itachi's, walking up to him.

"Well, well… Itachi, I am sorry to say, but I am not letting you go."

"WHAT?!?!"

"The reason? Because you have been putting us all down for quite some time. You need some punishment… Weasel-chan."

"WHAT DID YOU FUCKING CALL ME?!?!" Itachi was beyond angry now. He kicking his legs wildly, shaking his head, causing the pigtails to bounce a tad. Tobi beamed.

"Awww, that's so cute! I love his pigtails!" He giggled. Deidara snickered.

"Well, aren't you cute, weasel-chan? Just dangling there helplessly, hmm?"

"SHUT YOUR FUCKING TRAP AND LET ME GO!!!" Itachi shouted. Before another word could be said, a loud smack rang out followed by a short cry of surprise. Kisame had smacked Itachi's ass hard with the paddle in his hand. Itachi gasped, panting a bit in surprise. He tried to look behind him, but his shackled arms prevented this.

"Wh-What are you doing?!" He demanded angrily. Kisame patted the paddle on his hand.

"Punishing you…." He reeled the paddle back.

"NO! Kisame, don't you- OWWWW! OW!"

"You need some discipline anyway, weasel-chan."

"Stop calling- OWWW! OW! OW! STOP!" Itachi wailed, kicking his legs. The paddle was horribly painful as it hit his ass. Even with the frilly fluffy dress, it felt like it was being smacked right on his bare ass. Itachi screamed, twisting after another smack was given.

"Owww! Kisame, stop it! Ow! Ow! Stop it!! Owww!" He whined loudly. Deidara and Tobi snickered. Itachi's face was burning up in embarrassment as Kisame continued to smack his ass with the paddle. He whimpered loudly, squirming.

"Owww! Stop it! Stop! That hurts! Oww! Ow! Ow! Kisame, quit it!" He wailed, his ass wiggling. Itachi could feel that a tight frilly pair of underwear was given to him as well, but that's not what mattered! What mattered was that the underwear was making the impact terribly painful! Itachi wailed at last, his eyes welling up with sparkling tears.

"Stop! Stop it! Ow! Ow! Please, stop it!" He screamed at last. Kisame paused, looking at him.

"Did I just hear the P-word?" He asked, looking at Deidara and Tobi.

"Yes, I believe you did, Kisame." Deidara replied with a nod. Tobi nodded as well. Itachi whimpered in pain.

"Owww…" He moaned, his legs curling up a bit. He held his head down, hiding the red blush on his face and panting softly. Deidara stepped forward.

"Alright, Kisame… You got your revenge… It's my turn now." He grinned evilly. Itachi jerked his head up.

"HUH?!"

"Alrighty, Deidara… Have fun." Kisame laughed, stepping aside and resting the paddle on the floor. Itachi's eyes followed Deidara closely.

"What are you going to do?!" He demanded angrily a tad bit of fear in his voice. Deidara grinned and there was a crack sound. Itachi screamed, kicking again.

"Nooo! Deidara, don't you dare! If you- OWWWW!" He shrieked, kicking his legs about. The frills of the dress flashed while Itachi kicked. Deidara flung the whip forward, hitting Itachi's ankles. Itachi kicked, wailing.

"Stooop! Stop it! That hurts! That really hurts!"

"This is for insulting me!"

"OWWWW!"

"This is for being an asshole!"

"Owwwww!"

"This is for embarrassing me in front of the Akatsuki!"

"FUCKING JASHIN! Deidara, stop it! Owww!"

"And this is for being just a plain dumbass!"

"OWWWWWWW!" Itachi screamed in pain, blood seeping past a white stocking. Deidara smiled, tilting his head and his work. He had sliced the Lolita outfit just a bit, not too much to ruin the beautiful frills, but enough to cause a few red stains. Itachi panted loudly, whimpering in between. Tobi jumped up and down.

"MY TURN!" He sang. Deidara smirked, tossing the whip aside. Tobi reached out, unclasping the shackles, causing Itachi to fall to the floor. Itachi groaned, holding his ankles. Tobi reached out, pulling Itachi up and over his shoulder. Itachi's eyes went wide.

"Hey! Put me down! Let go!" He screamed, kicking and pounding his fists on Tobi's back hard. Tobi ignored it, then sat on the edge of the bed, shoving Itachi over his lap. Itachi's body froze.

"No… No! Tobi, don't you dare!" He shouted, already squirming. Tobi held him down with a free hand, then used his other one to push the dress away from Itachi's ass to reveal a pair of frilly white underwear. Itachi's face grew a new shade of dark red, his eyes wider.

"You-You- I'm going to kill you!" He shrieked, kicking his legs. Before Itachi could carry the threat out, however… Tobi's hand smacked down. Itachi screamed, kicking and wailing.

"Owwwww! Owww! Stop! No!" He whimpered. Tobi smacked his hand down again.

"Owww! Stop it!"

"Nope…"

"OW! T-Tobi! Stop it!"

"You need to be disciplined, Itachi-chan."

"Owww! Owww! Stop it! Stop it!" Itachi wailed, tears forming in his eyes. Tobi paused to let Itachi pant, then took the chance, pulling the frilly underwear down to Itachi's knees. Itachi's eyes snapped shut tightly with embarrassment. Kisame and Deidara stared in awe. Itachi's ass was already a soft red color from all their torture. The ass cheeks tensed, then loosened a bit every so often. They bounced a bit when Tobi laid the first smack. Itachi squealed in pain, wiggling his hips in pain.

"Owww! Tobi, stop it! Please!"

"No, no. You have to say some things before I stop…" SMACK! SMACK!

"Owww! Please, please! Stop it!"

"Hmm, so far so good." SMACK! SMACK! SMACK!

"Owwwww! T-Tobi-sama~! S-Stop it! Owww!"

"Hm, you're getting warmer… Literally." Tobi smirked, admiring his work. Itachi's ass was an angry red, the cheeks both an equal red. Tobi smiled and spanked again. Itachi wiggled his hips, kicking his legs and waving his arms around near the floor.

"Owwie! Stop it! Tobi-sama, please! Stop it! I'm begging you! Owwwww!"

"Very good. Now, what else?" SMACK! SMACK!

"Owwwww! Tobi-sama, s-stop it!"

"Closer…" SMACK! SMACK! Several more smacks were applied to the dark red ass.

"Ahhh! I've learned my lesson! Stop it! Please, please, please!! Stop it!" Itachi shrieked. Tobi nodded and stopped, clapping his hands together, making Itachi jump a bit. Kisame and Deidara were already laughing their ass off. Itachi whimpered loudly, hanging his head in shame. Tobi pulled Itachi off his lap and laid him on the bed.

"Well, Itachi. I hope you know better, ne?" He asked. He was replied with a pained whimper. Itachi touched his ass just with his fingertips and wailed. His ass stung like Hell! Tobi sure knew how to spank! Itachi panted a bit, sweating and whimpering from pain. Kisame suddenly found all this convenient… Itachi, lying in a sexy Lolita outfit all sweaty and red. Deidara seemed to notice as well since he was licking his lips hungrily. Tobi took a quick liking to the sight. Kisame made the first move, inching to the bed while Itachi panted for breath, moaning softly.

"Hmmm… Itachi, you're looking pretty good…" Kisame murmured boldly. Itachi gritted his teeth, then looked up in surprise.

"Huh?" His voice was so cute and adorable that Kisame couldn't take it. He climbed on the bed, pinning Itachi down on his stomach. Itachi yelped.

"Oww! Hey, Kisame, what're you- Aaah! Kisame!" He moaned loudly. Kisame had placed his tongue on Itachi's red ass, then dragged it along his crack. He reached out, spreading Itachi's ass cheeks apart to reveal a puckered hole. He leaned in, licking around the entrance. Itachi moaned, his leg twitching a bit. Deidara grimaced, wanting some of Itachi as well. Tobi was already making his move. Meanwhile, the neighbors of the motel snickered.

"Well, you did the right thing…" A female smirked.

"Yea, Paine." A male laughed. Paine chuckled.

"I know Itachi needs some discipline… And maybe some painful experiences…" He said.

"Konan should try looking at him." The male smirked. Konan glared at him.

"Shut it, Hidan… She muttered. Hidan smirked, then went back to listening.

I'll post as much as I can, by the way! ^^ I like to keep up-to-date on all my stories, so don't worry about any slow updating. Review, please~


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